


Family Planning

by Eldritch



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Crack, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-11-27
Updated: 2007-11-27
Packaged: 2017-10-20 06:48:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/209906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eldritch/pseuds/Eldritch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the resurrection of dark gods.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Family Planning

Bakura thought that, all things considered, he was a fairly calm person. Calm was a relative term when your daily life involved being possessed by a sadistic Egyptian spirit who liked to, depending on his mood, either turn people into dolls or tear out their eyeballs and lick them, but still. Calm. Collected. Not prone to sudden outbursts. Cheerful, even.

Of course, at the moment, he was screaming his head off, but he felt entirely justified in his behavior. "BUT WHAT IF I DON'T _WANT_ IT," he shrieked, twisting against the bonds of darkness holding him to the makeshift bed. How his subconscious or the dark realm or wherever he was--his mind was focused on more important things, like the figure looming up in front of him--even had a bed wasn't something he wanted to dwell on too closely.

"Would you just shut up and take it, already?" his dark self asked, sounding bored. He was perched on the headboard, examining his nails. They were crusted and red, and Bakura wondered slightly hysterically if he'd killed someone again and he just hadn't _noticed_.

 _Why don't_ you _take it_ , Bakura thought venomously, then proceeded to scream again as Zorc's second head extended over his prone form. A long, thick tongue slipped from the thing's fanged mouth and licked a stripe up his torso.

"He's gotta be reborn _somehow_ ," his dark self finished with a broad, mad grin.

* * *

"Yo, Bakura," Jounouchi said, somewhat awkwardly. "I don't wanna sound rude or nothing, but have you gained weight?"

Bakura groaned, covering his face with his hands and letting his head fall to his desk with a loud _thunk_.


End file.
